04
Apr
10

The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess – Part 2

-Oh, come ON!  Now there are kids yelling at my house!  Informing me that it’s morning, no less.  Do they have goats they need herding, too?

-My house has alot of ladders.  Apparently, this stew from yesterday afternoon is still boiling.  I have a picture of a goat on my wall.  For the life of me, I cannot remember why I own that.  It really shows where I stand with the village folk, though.  Those children are just standing around in front of my house!  That seems to happen alot.  It likely has something to do with that “Link’s House” sign.

-Ah, the weather today is great.  Very similar to yesterday, actually.  Perfect for my day off.

-Hey!  The kid finished the fishing rod he was making for me!  His name is Colin, by the way.  Apparently he was just going to give it to me here, but his Dad wants me to retrieve it from their house.  Of course…

-So, according to these lingering children, the shop is now selling a slingshot.  They seem very eager to play with it, however they have no money.  Ah, and this other girl is the shop owner’s daughter.  Clearly she has no interest in lending it to these other kids.  Also, the 2 boys are the sons of the people whose pumpkin patch I trampled yesterday on Epona.  I won’t mention a thing.

-Colin won’t let me ride my own horse!  He would rather just have her stand here, so he can stare at her.  Whatever, kid.  Aww, I can’t stay mad at him, he made me a fishing rod, despite his Father’s delusions.  Also, he has very sad eyes.  Very well, I will WALK to the village.  Heh, I should just buy that slingshot myself.  That’ll show’em.

-Once I reach town, I see that this man is trying to knock down a bee hive….Good idea.  Oh, right, this is the shop owner’s husband.  Apparently his wife is in a horrible mood, because their cat hasn’t come home.  I…really hope it wasn’t playing in that pumpkin patch when I…oh god.

-Heck, I’ll see if I can get the bee hive down for him.  There are some vines, leading up the tree.  Actually, this seems pretty dangerous.  Meh, I herd goats for a living.

-GAHH!! BEEES!!! THEY’RE EVERYWHERE!!!  TELL MY HORSE I LO-

-Oh….oh god….that was…really stupid.  I…I jumped in the lake…twisted my ankle.  Oh man…I feel like i just lost 2 1/2 hearts, or something.  Whew…

-There is a man with a hilariously tall forehead standing atop a rock.  He spotted the cat!!  It’s just sitting over there, staring at the water!  Now he’s making a joke about it….this man is really not helpful.  Also, he spotted more grass over there!  On the next rock!  Hmm, this isn’t the horseshoe shaped grass, though.

-HOLY-…oh man, that startled me.  I played a song on the grass (it’s my thing), and this bird flew down.  Now it’s on my arm.  Heh, animals love me.  I must be part animal.  What am I supposed to do with this bird… boy, he’s heavy.

-Ok, he’s gone.  That was awkward.  People were just staring.  They were like, “What’s Link gonna do?”, and I was just sort of like “Umm, hey everone…”.

-I fell off the rock…I hope nobody saw that.  Luckily, I landed in the water.  I landed awkwardly, it actually really hurt my back.

-KITTY!  Come here, little fella.

-This cat hates me.  Seriously, I have chased him for 10 minutes.  Then I spent another 20 minutes looking for some grass that resembled a mouse or something.  People thought I was nuts, but the joke’s on them, I found some money in the shrubbery!  Yessir, I’ll have that slingshot in no time.  Then, you know what, I won’t even let those kids use it.  Also, I threw a pumpkin, and there was some money in there too.  Figure that one out…

-Maybe I can utilize that bird into spooking the cat.  It scared me half to death.

-Fell off the rock again.  Stupid…rock…surface…

-AHA!  Here comes the bird again!  This grass, I tell ya, it’s like it was made for this.  Ok, now if I can…try to aim this…just right…

-Nope.

-Miss.

-This is getting silly.

-Sorry, lady!

-Well, I didn’t make any progress with the cat, BUT, I did…purposely…knock that bee hive down!  Yes…that was totally planned.

You know, it’s amazing how much easier it is to climb this tree, when there aren’t bees stinging you all over.  HEY!  There’s money in this tree!  It seems strategically placed at the very edge of the branches.  Not to worry, I do this kind of stu-

-Now THAT was graceful.  Admittedly, I fell out of the tree, BUT, I landed on the blanketed top of the house underneath, with no damage suffered!  Granted, nobody saw it, but trust me, that was impressive.

-I tripped as I went to walk away.  THAT, they saw.  “Whoa there, Link.  Maybe you should lay off the potion, hehe”.  Yeah, well, maybe you should…lay off the….whatever.

-I CAUGHT A CHICKEN!!  I flew with it!! I swear!!  I jumped off this really short bridge, and we soared.  I landed in the water, which wasn’t as impressive.

-Anyway, I ran into that nice lady, who is married to the man who wants me to deliver the package to Hyrule.  According to her, the man left with his sword early this morning.  A reminder, this is the same man who I saw yesterday, slashing his sword at nothing.  I can only imagine what kind of “opponents” he will be battling.

-Hm?  She lost a baby cradle.  Geez, was the baby in it?

-The baby was not in it, she is holding him.  Apparently, she lost  the cradle in this stream of water.  Fear not, ma’am.  I will find your missing baby…cradle.

-I miss Epona, she would have loved this hawk throwing stuff.

-Ah, there’s the mayor.  I should see if he knows anything about this thing I’m supposed to deli- GOOOAAAAT!!!

-So, apparently, “Mr. I-Can-Handle-The-Farm-Alone”, can’t keep track of his livestock.  There I was, chatting with the mayor, when all of a sudden, this goat comes running towards us!  The Mayor was terrified, I’m sure, but luckily, I was there to catch it.  I grabbed it by the horns, gave it a swing, and BAM!  On the ground!  Good game, Goat, good game.

-Ahh, the horse-thieving girl is the Mayor’s daughter.  Maybe she’d like to see me catch another goat.  I…oh…she is not having visitors today, apparently.  Well…that’s fine.   Maybe she saw it through the window.  Pfft, as if I even care.

-So there I was, climbing around on the Mayor’s roof, and…oh, it’s not what you think.  I was looking for….my…other sandle.  Anyway, not only did I find some money up there, but I also found some more hawk grass!  So, naturally, I played the song, summoned the hawk, and, well, it got away soon after, but I was almost certain that something cool would have happened!

-Apparently, another family in town, is making a shield for Colin’s father.  Why do they feed his delusions like this?

-MONKEY!!  I spotted a monkey!  I was gracefully climbing on some rocks, above the water, and I spotted him!  Across the river.  And you won’t guess what else.  This monkey, has the baby cradle!!  Ohh boy, just you wait, little fellow.  You have no idea what’s coming to you.

-As expected, there was no way I could have jumped that far.

-I must find some other means.  Bear with me, we will rescue this woman’s baby (cradle)!!  That’ll show them.

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3 Responses to “The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess – Part 2”


  1. April 4, 2010 at 1:31 pm

    Bees everywhere???? Reminds me of Min’s house

  2. 2 Min
    April 4, 2010 at 3:00 pm

    THOSE WERE EARWIGS!!!!

  3. April 4, 2010 at 4:12 pm

    Does that make it any better?


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